Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Creepmas Horror Tunes Countdown: The Top 3

#3: Matthew McPeck – F**k Christmas (I Wish It Was Halloween)

 Sample Lyrics –
You Hallmark fascists expect me sober
When you start playing your f**king songs in October!
Hark the herald devils sing Halloween.
So to you holiday-loving sons of bitches,
Screw you all and hey, F**K CHRISTMAS!
All I need is my baby, my baby and Halloween.

I’d be willing to guess that there’s not a one of us who hasn’t expressed that sentiment at some point.  Are you looking at the lights and tinsel and wishing that they were jack-o-lanterns and spider webs instead?  Then this is your anthem.  This synth-pop/proto-goth style song expresses exactly how I feel every December and only gets more and more timely as the big day gets closer and closer.

#2:  Screaming Lord Sutch – Creepy Christmas

Sample Lyrics –
The Creature from the Black Lagoon howling carols out of tune
A demon and a vampire roasting chestnuts on a fire
And the one that they call Lestat groovin’ in a party hat
Dr. Jeckyll playing Hyde & seek, they were dancing cheek to cheek.

If you just said “who?” then turn in your horror music lover’s card NOW!  In the 60’s, Screaming Lord Sutch was innovating the theatrical horror shock rock show well before Alice Cooper or Arthur Brown.  He also ran for parliament 40 times as part of the Official Monster Raving Looney Party.  He was an interesting dude to say the least.  In 1989, he and his band, dubbed “The X-Mas Creeps” for this release, unleashed this groovy number about a party I would have killed my grandmother to attend.  For the record, if that sax solo doesn’t get you in the rockin’ holiday spirit, you don’t have a soul.

Screamerclauz – 12 Days of Axemess

Sample Lyrics - 
Nope.  Trust me, this one is better when you don’t know what’s coming.

Maybe my favorite Christmas song of all time.  Before he blew our minds and shredded our souls with his demented animated film Where The Dead Go To Die, Jimmy Screamerclauz was horrifying people with his music.  What do you get when a sicko like Screamerclauz mixes a traditional version of a Christmas classic with clips from flicks like Zombie Flesh Eaters, I Drink Your Blood, and Night of the Demons?  Pure hilarity.  The first time I heard this I may or may not have laughed until I peed a little.  Extra horror geek cred if you can name all of the movies and shows he samples.


Chloe Grace Moretz said...

Merry Christmas.

jervaise brooke hamster said...

Chloe, i want to bugger you my dear.

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